Spit It Out!

Proverbs 15:28

The heart of the righteous weighs it answers, but the mouth of the wicked gushes evil.

Proverbs 16:24

Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.

Proverbs 16:32

Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.

Proverbs 17:14

Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.

Proverbs 21:23

Those who guard their mouths and their tongues keep themselves from calamity.

Is it just me, or is there a pattern here?  It would seem that we are being warned against the hasty use of our vocal abilities.  Our words, if you will.  Because those seemingly insignificant things are the most deadly weapon mankind possesses. 

Yes, the old saying is “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words may never harm me”, but never has an old saying been more wrong.  Words can destroy so much more effectively than any material weapon.  Saying the wrong thing at the wrong time can ruin friendships far easier than a blow can. 

Yet we use this inherent power so flippantly.  We tear down others in order to make ourselves look better in the moment.  You know what I’m talking about.  That time when you’re talking with your group of friends and Joey says something that sets up a beautiful comeback that you know will make everyone laugh, even though it is hurtful to Joey.  But what does it matter?  It’s just words, just a joke.  He’ll understand and get over it.  And that might true.  He could take the joke and laugh with everyone else, even though it hurts.  Because it will hurt.  It doesn’t matter if it’s a joke.  It doesn’t matter if he knows it’s a joke.  No matter which way you cut it, you thought that of Joey, and you said it, and it’s going to hurt.

No biggy, though, right? Just a little laugh at Joey’s expense that you’ll all forget tomorrow.  Except not.  It’s just the beginning.  Now, with the success from last time, when the opportunity arises again, you don’t hesitate to let that snappy remark fly.  Pretty soon it becomes habit and you don’t even think about it anymore.  The only thing you think about is how to produce even more clever remarks, no matter how hurtful they might be. 

And that is the desensitized state of our society.  It’s second nature now, for everyone.  When that opportunity knocks, when that awesome comeback flashes in our minds, we don’t stop to consider the consequences.  Nope, we just blurt it out.  People laugh, we feel good.  Except for that little twinge for the person we used.  Even that disappears soon. 

That’s exactly what we do not want to be.  What I do not want to be.  It’s yet another thing I struggle with daily.  Because we’re always around people, whether it be family or friends, and I can guarantee that the urge to be the funny guy at the expense of others is gonna be there.  I feel it all the time, and I see it in others even more often.  I’ve seen how it hurts people, even when they try to make it seem like it doesn’t.  So I try my hardest to never give into the urge to blurt those things out when it comes to me.  Yeah, it may make me seem like the quiet dude who never really says anything.  Sure, I might seem like the socially awkward homeschooler.  But let me ask you a question.

Which is more important:  Your social standing, or another person’s feelings?

Dear Lord, I ask that You open my eyes and ears and close my mouth.  I want to listen and consider before answering with something that I will regret.  I thank You for the guidance You have given me through Your word and ask that You move in both mine and the reader’s life through it.  Amen.