Meet Fred

Today you get to meet Fred.  That is correct, Fred, my good friend and constant companion.  In this blog post, you shall hear the first of his adventures.  And it will be a doozy, you can take his word on it, because mine might not be reliable.  Well, without further ado, I shall begin.

Fred was walking down the street one day, as he does often, when he saw something shiny in the middle of the street.  It was just sitting there, twinkling brightly in the sun.  Now Fred cannot resist anything shiny (who can?), so he walked over to it and reached down to pick it up.  Something hit him.  Hard.  Everything went black.

When he came to, he was lying flat on his back on some comfortable grass.  To his extreme disappointment, the shiny thing was not in his hand anymore.  He got to his feet, but before he could look around, a fawn popped out of nowhere.

“Welcome, Son of Adam!” the fawn said. “We have been anxiously awaiting your arrival.”

Fred stared at the fawn and said the first thing that came to mind. “Hi.”

The fawn turned and began to walk away. “Come.  There is much to be done before the White Witch can be defeated.”

“Hold up,” Fred had recovered from his initial shock. “You’re a fawn, there’s a White Witch, is this Narnia?”

The fawn nodded, but didn’t stop walking.

“Whoa there, buddy,” Fred called after him. “I ain’t fighting any White Witch.  It’s way too dangerous.  She might turn me to stone, or even give me Turkish delight.  That stuff’s nasty.”

The fawn turned back. “You don’t like Turkish delight?”

“No.”

With a sigh, the fawn shook his head. “Then you’re no good.”

He tossed something to Fred, who caught it.  Everything went black again.

When he came around again, he was back on his back, but this time it hurt and he was on hard concrete.  People were standing over him looking scared and worried.  A siren was blaring in the distance, coming closer.  Fred felt something in his hand and managed to glance down at it. 

He had the shiny object.

There he is folks.  Fred.  A regular guy to whom really weird things happen.  You could say he doesn’t take full advantage of those opportunities, but hey, he’s a simple dude with simple wants.  Going to Narnia or whatnot is not among those wants.  But maybe someday I’ll tell you about the time he tried to eradicate terrorism once and for all.  It's an interesting tale, that one.