Okay okay. I’m sure you’re all wondering how I managed to shut Wilfred up, so I’ll simply say that I am Owen Tucker (who woulda thunk it?) and that this is my journal thingy.
8/6/12: On this date (that being the 8th of August in the year 2012) I had just successfully stopped Wilfred from talking. Pretty amazing, huh? Note that I said talking. He was still making loud, angry sounding buzzing noises, but I could ignore those real easy like. So I did.
A quick look around the room showed me that there wasn’t anything else up there except the glass sword thingy, so I proceeded back down the stairs. And down the stairs. And down ‘em some more. They just kept going and going and going and going and going and going and going! How’d I get up them in the first place? Eventually I stopped for a rest, just like last time. Except now I was facing down, which was a little more depressing because the light wasn’t very bright at the bottom.
“Don’t these stairs ever end?” I asked of nobody in particular.
Wilfred took it upon himself to reply with more buzzing.
The glass sword thingy took it upon itself to flash. Use me for evil.
I glared at it. “Shut up. You’re absolutely useless. If you were any use at all, we wouldn’t be stuck on some endless stairway.”
It flashed. Use me for evil.
In disgust I tossed it down the stairs. It flew through the air with a fancy spiral and clattered to the bottom of the stairs, taunting me with an occasional shine.
“That’s just rude!” I yelled at it.
“Tuh, ya’re one ta talk.”
“Wilfred?” I looked around surprised. “You’re talking again?”
“Obviously.”
“Cool. Do you know how we get out of this place?”
“Ah supoose ya culd jest toss ya’self down them stairs there. Et worked fa tha sword.”
“Do you have any idea how we get out without me ending up in the hospital?”
“Nary a one.”
I sighed and leaned back on the stairs, suddenly feeling very trapped, hot, and thirsty. “I wish I had some water.”
I sat up spluttering as splash of ice cold water hit my face.
I coughed. “No no. I meant I wish for like a bottle, not a freaking splash.”
Lo and behold a bottle of water appeared in my hand. I opened it up and took a chug.
“Ah, that’s good. Thanks.” I froze. “Waaaaiiitttt a second. Where’d you get that water, Wilfred? And how’d you carry it?”
“Wha’re ya talkin’ aboot, lad?”
“The water that just splashed me and this bottle,” I waved it around in the air. “Where’d they come from?”
“Na a clue.”
“Well they had to come from somewhere. I wish I knew.”
The sword at the bottom of the stairs flashed. You wished them into existence.
I stared at it. “What are you talking about?”
This is a wishing staircase. You wished the water to you.
“That’s awesome! Wait, why are you helping me? You just want me to use you for evil.”
I’m sure the darn thing sighed regretfully. You wished to know. I was forced to explain.
I grinned. “Cool.”
“Lad, ya reelly need ‘elp.”
“Wilfred, I’m sure you’ll be glad to hear that from my ‘hallucinations’ I have found out that this staircase is a wishing staircase.”
“Oh? An’ jest ‘ow da ya knoo thes?”
“Watch. I wish I had some ice cream.”
A gallon of vanilla ice cream appeared on the stair beside me.
“No no. A gallon of mint chocolate chip ice cream.”
The vanilla disappeared, replaced with mint chocolate chip.
I grinned. “See? How do you like that?”
“Then geet us offa thes dern staircase.”
“All right then.” I stood up. “I wish we were at the bottom of this staircase.”
Bam! We were at the bottom and Wilfred was speechless. An awesome conclusion if I ever seen one.
To be continued…
No comments:
Post a Comment