Uh Oh

     Go up up up up doooooooowwwwwwnnnnnnn roundabout up up dooowwwnnn (scream [or, if manly, yell]) up spin round and round swirl down (scream/yell) and up up down turn round loopty loop (scream/yell) upside down slam brakes.
     And that, my friends, is what is entailed in a rollercoaster! A most enjoyable experience if I do say so myself. Which is why Six Flags is so awesome. You just hop on a rollercoaster, then hop on it again, and again, and again. Once you’ve tired of it, you go hop on another, then another, and another. And you do this all day, or until the park closes. It’s awesome!
     Unfortunately for you lot, though, I am not in the mood to stick to one subject. So we shall not be discussing Six Flags, awesome as it is. Instead, we shall be discussing toadstools! Wait…no, we won’t. I know nothing about toadstools. That was just the first word that came to mind. What is a toadstool? Perhaps a stool for a toad. But that makes no sense. Why would a toad need a stool? Ah well, I’m sure there’s a perfectly logical explanation out there somewhere for its name. I could no doubt find it, but I’m too lazy to go Google it now.
     Why don’t we talk about lettuce instead? Yes, that is again the first word that popped into my mind. But hey, y’know, random words can make for good discussion. Take lettuce for instance. It’s green, and it’s a vegetable, which means that it’s good for you. Yes, yes it is. Some may try to deny it, but lettuce’s wholesomeness is undeniable. Bunny rabbits like it too. So do guinea pigs. And all those other vegetarian animals. They see lettuce and are all like “Omnomnomnomnom!” Humans like it a bunch too (adults anyway). But they have to load it down with all sorts of fixings and flavors. Just plain lettuce isn’t good enough for them. It’s good enough for the critters, though, so I’d say they’re happier.
     Speaking of which, have I ever mentioned how darn cute guinea pigs are? If I haven’t, I’m sorry. If I have, I’m still sorry, because I’m going to mention it again. Those little buggers are beyond cute and they do love a good leaf of lettuce. They also like carrots, grass, leaves, celery, and basically anything that’s green and vegetable-like. You should go Google pics of the little buggers and go “Oooo” and “Aaaahhhh” over how cute they are. Then go buy one of your own and feed it wholesome goodness. Train it to squeak too. They’re even cuter when they squeak.
     Besides cute critters there are barrels of crackers. You’d probably want some cheese to go with those crackers though. Just plain crackers can be rather dry after a bit. Unless they’re Ritz crackers, which are awesome with or without cheese. But the barrel of crackers I was actually talking about was not a real barrel of crackers. Oh no. I was speaking of Cracker Barrel, which, if you think about it, is possibly better than a barrel of crackers. They definitely have better pancakes than a barrel of crackers does. Hhhmmm, a barrel of crackers with pancakes. I think I’m on to something. Possibly some syrup too. Mix it all together and serve with milk. Maybe orange juice, or apple, depending on your preference. You’ll definitely need something to drink with that. Just make sure they aren’t salty crackers. If they are, then you’ll be in trouble which I’m not sure you’ll be able to escape. It will hunt you down and force salty crackers down your throat if you try to escape it. Not a good thing. So just avoid those salty crackers with your pancakes and syrup and you’ll be all good.