Squirrel Felony

     Hey guys.  I, Owen Tucker, am back. 
     And right here would usually be the place where somebody does a nice little recap of last week for you.  Unfortunately for you, I am not that somebody.  You wanna know what happened last week?  Go read it for yourself.  Ain’t I a swell guy?
     Anywho, enough with the small talk.  Back to the journal thingy.
     5/22/12:  On this date (that being the 5th of May in the year 2012) I was sitting in my room, busily doing nothing, and doing it quite happily, when my work was interrupted with a very rude interruption.  This was no ordinary rude interruption.  Nothing like when you go up to your mom when she’s talking and ask a question.  Yeah that’s rude, but this was way worse.  On a scale of 1 to 10, this here interruption was like a 57.
     Oh.  What was the interruption?  I guess that would be an important factor.  Well, you see, I was sitting in my room, like I said, when all of the sudden, with no warning whatsoever, a squirrel jumps out of nowhere and face plants against my window!  Now that’s what I call rude.  Absolutely no warning.  The thing doesn’t squeak, or chatter, or do whatever squirrels do.  It just up and slams into my window, freaking me out of my mind.
     The squirrel was fine, don’t worry about it.  The little bugger just got up and scampered off like nothing happened.  Not even an apology.  The least he could’ve done was leave behind a nut or something.  But nnnoooo.  He just ups and slams into the window without as much as a “by your leave” and then runs from the scene of the crime.  He should be arrested and charged with vandalism.  Pesky little blighters, squirrels are.  If we keep letting them get away with stuff like this, who knows what they’ll do?  They might start stealing our food, digging in our yards, and spray-painting nasty squirrel words on our cars!
      Ehem.  I digress.  After the squirrel bounced off the window, I, like I said, freaked out.  And since I was eating a sandwich at the time, well let’s just say I lost a sandwich (another charge that should be added to the squirrel’s list of felonies).  I then proceeded to rush outside and shake my fist at the tree which the squirrel had run up.  For dramatic effect, you see.  And to calm myself.  Being able to shake my fist at something always help.  But the squirrel chucked a nut at me, which smacked me right on top of the head, so the fist shaking didn’t help much.  So I tried chucking the nut back up.  He just chucked it back down harder.  Good thing he wasn’t a woodchuck, or it could’ve really hurt.  As it were, he just made me madder.  So I went inside and pulled out my BB gun.  But when I came back out, the little bugger was gone.  He must’ve had some sort of animal sixth sense.  Or he just didn’t feel like waiting for me to get back to chuck more nuts.
     Either way, I’ll never forget that squirrel.  Never forget him, never forgive him.  And if I ever see him again, he’ll rue the day.  Y’hear me, squirrel!?  You’ll rue the day! 
    To you, good reader, this is Owen Tucker.  Over and out.

    To be continued…maybe…